Better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble with it. [Proverbs 15:16]
About three years ago, my wife was bombarding me with information about adoption agencies. And I remember thinking, “This is silly. We don’t have enough money to adopt. And do I really want to go into that much debt to do so?” But I didn’t relate much of this thinking to my wife. Instead I dragged my feet. I wondered aloud,sometimes, if we could afford this. My hope was that my wife would eventually lose interest and give up on this “fantasy”. Basically, I wanted her to let me off the hook because I was nervous about how much we didn’t have.
Thankfully she didn’t give up.
She continued pressing forward and eventually we found this agency and case worker that we would end up using to adopt our children. Yes, that’s plural. I am the proud daddy, now, of two beautiful and wonderful children. And I can’t imagine my life without them.
What was the difference for me?
A faith journey and transformation, and a better understanding of the fear of God through Jesus Christ.
You see, I was comfortable with my comfortable checkbook. I enjoyed my freedom and the flexibility that having “treasures” afforded me. I was still a Christian, serving as a pastor, but I wanted my cake and eat it too. But deep down inside I knew I was missing something; I just couldn’t place my finger on it then. Eventually (and I am not sure what precipitated this) but God pushed me over the ledge and said,
“Trust me”
So I did.
It was still scary to dive into adoption knowing the high cost of it, but along every step of the way, God brought friends and family and other caring community members to help us raise money and eventually finance our adoptions. And I praise God for each and every one of them because I know it was God acting through those people.
Money can’t buy you happiness.
A comfortable checkbook can’t truly make you comfortable.
A peaceful life now can’t bring you true peace.
Treasures in this life will never last.
The author of the Proverbs is not saying that if you have great treasure that you will be miserable and that if you have very little then everything will be great. That’s not what he is saying. The difference, he says, is faith; faith in the living God. And for us Christians, it is faith in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior; truly believing that Jesus died and rose for you that you may have true peace and hope.
That’s the difference.
And so for me, my checkbook is a little thinner, but I don’t seem to care much about that anymore.
[Please don’t praise my faith here, but rather give glory to God where it belongs]
God has provided and I believe God will continue to do so. Sure, I have my moments of worry from time to time; wondering how I am going to pay for certain things for my kids (especially as my oldest approaches school age). But as I worry and wonder and maybe even drag my feet a little from time to time, God continues to push me and say,
“Trust me, my child, trust me”
And so I do. And that is comforting.
Loving Father, please continue to push me when I starting doubting Your provision in my life. Give me those reminders of what you have already done so I may cling to those as Satan tries to plant hopelessness and fear in me. May I see very much even when I have little. And if I ever have very much, may I see that I have very little without you. Grant me the strength, oh God, that you may be glorified in my life. In Jesus name, Amen.
The Pastor -|—