Parenting

Pulling Him Close

/ The Pastor

I want to share a story with you quick before the moment passes too far.

It was a moment that took place around 11 PM last night. My wife and I were getting ready for bed when I heard our little girl, Mayah, calling out for mommy and daddy. I went into her room; bent over her crib and said, “Sweetie, are you alright? What do you need?” She said nothing. I asked again but still nothing. Then I noticed that she didn’t have her mookie in her mouth so I searched and quickly found it under her pillow. I then asked, “Sweetie, is that better?” Still nothing. Then she stood up which meant she wanted to be rocked. Normally when I come into her room at night she tells me, “I want to rock” But no words this time. Just actions.

So I picked up my little girl, grabbed her blanket and sat down with her in the rocking chair. She then quickly curled up on my lap and snuggled in as close as she could possibly get, and peacefully went to sleep.

A huge smile formed on my face 🙂

I sat there staring down at my sweet little girl, as happy as I could be; not wanting the moment to end. I then gently leaned over and planted a soft kiss on her cheek as to not disturb her peaceful slumber. But upon receiving my loving kiss, Mayah started moving her arm. She was trying to free her arm from her cozy blanket. Upon her arm breaking free, Mayah reached up and placed her hand on the back of my neck. She then pulled me in so my cheek was next to hers, and then held me tight. A gentle but firm hold as to say, “I want you close.” And with that she drifted off to sleep with tears of joy welling up in my eyes. After a couple of wonderful minutes, Mayah’s arm went limp and fell to her body. I then stood up, kissed her again and gently laid her in her crib. I leaned over and stared at her for a few more moments; watching her sleep, and then left her to her peaceful slumber.

What a moment, but now leave it to a pastor/.daddy to make a connection to our heavenly Father:

Oh that we would call out to God more and more; longing to be held by him and then pull God close for an intimate moment. Sometimes words are not necessary but rather just a few moments, basking in God’s love. Oh that we would call out to God and seek him; as God is always there, ready to show you incredible love. Oh that we would call out to God and know his grace; something that never fades and is never distant.

Oh that we would call out to our heavenly daddy…

The Pastor -|—

Sweet Malachi

/ The Pastor / 1 Comment

Malachi, sweet Malachi,
today you are one;
growing up fast;
putting a smile on our face every single day,
and touching our hearts along the way.

Malachi, sweet Malachi,
it’s hard to believe, though,
that one year ago
we didn’t know you existed
but God did, and that’s what matters.

Malachi, sweet Malachi,
and even though we weren’t there when you were born,
God was there and that’s what matters,
and even though we weren’t the first to hold you,
God was the first to hold you and that’s what matters too.

Malachi, sweet Malachi,
you may not carry our DNA,
or look similar to us,
but you are our son, forever and ever,
but what matters even more is that you are a child of God.

Malachi, sweet Malachi,
one year ago you entered the world,
to make Mayah a big sister,
and mommy and daddy happy parents of two.
And we love you, sweet Malachi.

Malachi, sweet Malachi,
today we praise God for you,
for bringing you into our lives.
Today is your birthday and
so we shout “Happy birthday” and “God is great”.

Happy first birthday, our sweet Malachi.

The Pastor (Daddy) -|—

The Nose Poke

/ The Pastor

Sometimes it is the little things in life that can break through crabbiness, a downtrodden spirit and/or selfishness; putting a smile on one’s face and placing things in perspective. Last night was one of those nights for me.

My wife was at camp; volunteering as a camp nurse, and wasn’t going to be home until after bedtime. That meant I was on my own with two kids; something I have done before. Everything was going great. My two year old was behaving and being a good little girl until…

…I was about to lay down a sleeping 8 month old. At the moment Mayah thought it was necessary to bring one of Malachi’s noisy toys into the room to show me.

Enough said.

Malachi was awake and I was frustrated; frustrated with the situation and frustrated with Mayah. My attitude became sour and therefore I probably wasn’t as playful with Mayah as I should have been. The evening was lost.

I finally got Malachi down and then got Mayah ready for bed. Still crabby I read her some books, prayed with her and laid her down. A couple minutes later, as I was enjoying some peace and quiet; trying to calm down, I hear Mayah calling out for me through the baby monitor. Still crabby, I went in to see what was the matter. She just wanted to rock some more. So we cuddled up in the rocking chair and then she broke through.

As I am looking at her she gently reaches up with her finger, pokes me in the nose and smiles.

That was it
A nose poke
and a smile

My eyes immediately teared up. What did my crabby attitude get me that night? Nothing but lost time with a playful toddler. I squeezed her tighter and confessed my crabbiness to God.

Oh God, forgive me. Help me to repent. May I not lose time like this again.

It never ceases to amaze me how God uses the little things to break through. I was intent on being crabby; to show Mayah that she interrupted my schedule and my expectations for the night, but she just wanted to be my little girl. And I wonder if God feels something like this at times. We have our expectations but then they go south that leads our attitudes to blow up. All the while God has something else in mind and just wants to be our God.

Maybe we just need to be a little patient, go with the flow and let God be God. And if you forget, don’t worry, God will playfully poke your nose 🙂

Father God, break through my “tough” exterior and show me your love when I am intent on being my own god. Amen.

The Pastor -|—

The Heart of a Child

/ The Pastor / 2 Comments

The heart of the child is something that should be nurtured, cared for and encouraged, because what is planted in the heart of a child, especially at a young age, is something that will pay dividends later in life; for the child and for the Church.

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6 ESV)

This past Sunday during worship, I was up front leading the offering prayer and then led the congregation in the Lord’s Prayer. As I was praying I started to hear the voice of a child also praying and I quickly recognized it.

It was my 2-year-old little girl.

My heart immediately melted as I stopped saying the words of the Lord’s Prayer so I could listen. Mayah didn’t say all the words of the prayer but she was definitely trying. I knew she had been doing this for a while but I just never heard her before Sunday.

I was one proud daddy 🙂

I have heard parents lament over whether their kids are getting anything out of worship. I tell them that they might not understand everything now but they are definitely getting something out of it so don’t give up. Children have amazing recording devices in their brains that are connected to their five senses. They take in information (good and bad) but they may not process it until later; when they are able to decode what their brains were too young to comprehend then. It may seem like you child is just goofing off or not paying attention or just plain bored;

but keep at it (with the good stuff, that is),

keep training them;
keep exposing them to the saints of the congregation;
keep bringing them to the assembly;
keep the rituals of the faith in front of them;
keep talking about Jesus with them;
keep planting seeds.

Granted, Mayah doesn’t understand what she is trying to say now but she is beginning to understand that when we gather in this room every week we say these familiar words. As she grows up she will hopefully begin to comprehend what she is praying. Seeds are being planted now. So all that is left for me to do is to continue to nurture those seeds and be patient; waiting to see what the Holy Spirit will bring forth from them.

So…

parents of young children,
people who worship with parents of young children,
pastors who lead worship for parents of young children;

never, ever resent the presence of noisy children in worship but rather do your part as a member of the Body of Christ to raise children up in the way they should go. Never dampen the spirit of a child as they are trying to make sense of the faith. Never discourage a parent who only wants their children to experience worship with the assembly. Never take for granted what children may be absorbing during worship. Never glare or stare or judge, but rather teach and encourage and nurture. You just never know what children are learning, as it just might be something they will hold on too even when everything else has seemingly left them.

Let’s not show children the proverbial door through our impatience or being annoyed that they are squawking during a “holy moment” in worship, but rather let’s be in the business of planting and nurturing seeds; remembering how Jesus received children…

And they were bringing children to him (Jesus) that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them. (Mark 10:13-16 ESV)

It takes a village to raise a child and it takes a Church to pass on the faith and it takes a child to teach us adults the humility required to receive the kingdom of God. The circle of faith.

Father God, grant me the faith of a little child; one that receives you as their father. May I be granted the wisdom to teach children and serve as a faithful example of Your love. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

The Pastor -|—

Holy Parenting (Ephesians 6:4)

/ The Pastor

image

I claim no expertise in parenting but rather, I claim a strong desire and passion to raise my children to know and love God through Jesus Christ. And that is why I am so drawn to the above verse. I am constantly thinking about ways to be a good example but also thinking about what my children are seeing in me. Children are going to learn about God from their parents. Hopefully they learn a lot at Sunday school and Bible camp and vacation Bible school, but children will learn about loving and living with God by watching their parents.

So parents be mindful.

But not just parents. Church, be mindful. The children are watching you too. Whether you have children or not, they are watching you. When you are in worship; children are watching you. When you are interacting with others; children are watching you. Whether you like it or not you are being recorded by a child’s built in video camera in their brains, so be mindful.

But one of the biggest misconceptions in parenting is that as parents we need to be their child’s “best friend”. Children don’t need that. They have plenty of people to be best friends with. According to scripture, children need parents that will discipline them and teach them to know the Lord.

Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him. (Proverbs 13:24 ESV)

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t share this verse in order to advocate beating your child. This verse is about a parent’s God-given responsibility to discipline a child when they go astray. How a child is to be disciplined is something for another blog post. But here, parents are not called to be best friends. Parents are called to raise their children to walk the narrow path; disciplining their children out of love not anger.

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6 ESV)

And a parent may actually do this but see their child stray from the faith. If this happens, be patient, you have planted a seed. So don’t lose heart. Keep training them in the way they should go. How this training goes will vary from parent to parent but the common thread is, don’t be their best friend, be a faithful example of the Christian life. Love your children but even more than that, love God.

I have said this a number of times but it bears repeating:
The best thing a parent can do for their child(ren) is to love God more than them.

That right there says a lot. Love God above all things and all people and as a parent, you will do fine 🙂

Father God, parenting is hard work. Grant Your Spirit that parents and other adults may have the wisdom it takes to pass the faith on to the next generation. In Jesus name, Amen

The Pastor -|—

My Little Pulpit Visitor

/ The Pastor

Nothing deep and theological here tonight, just a cute worship story involving this pastor/daddy and his little girl.

This morning I was in the pulpit; in the zone and preaching on Mark 9:14-29. It was a serious text (as they all are) on living in the dark valley of life; being confronted by Satan. I was cruising along, when about half way through the sermon I noticed a disturbance in the force…

… my little girl (23 months old) working her way towards the pulpit.

I knew a problem was developing and my wife was otherwise occupied with our 4 1/2 month old son. So I continued and pretended not to notice; hoping there wouldn’t be a problem, but the force is strong in my little girl.

Mayah proceeded to walk in front of the pulpit before she realized she couldn’t reach daddy going that way. She promptly turned around and quickly solved her problem as she found the steps that lead to daddy. Mayah then crawled up the steps and proceeded to position herself in front of me; holding her arms up and waiting for me to pick her up. It took everything in me not to reach down and pick her up. It was even hard not to smile at all this cuteness.

I continue to preach and tried to stay in the zone as Mayah asserted herself ever so quietly (what a polite little girl). She eventually took a break and sat on the steps before trying again to convince me to chuck my sermon and give her the attention she desperately wanted.

Finally she relented and worked her way back down the couple steps and back to mommy. I continued preaching all the while keeping one eye on my little girl; and feeling a little guilty that I didn’t pick her up (and hoping no one noticed my mental distraction).

But I am not surprised by this. I knew this day would come eventually and I know there will be more. I guess this is just part of the joy of being a pastor and a daddy, and you know something, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

The Pastor -|—

Evening Prayer ~ My Son

/ The Pastor

My five month old son…

…is resting peacefully in my arms.

…will gaze into my eyes and smile.

…will sit in his bouncy seat but definitely prefers mommy or daddy’s arms.

…depends on us for food and care.

…can do nothing to cause me to love him less.

…did nothing to earn my love.

…sleeps much better when mommy or daddy is near.

Oh God, if only I would look at you in the same way. If only I would trust you and depend on you like my son trusts and depends on me. If only I could learn a child-like faith like my little boy’s.

Oh God, draw me close that I may see you as a child sees their mommy and daddy.
Draw me close that I may learn to trust you with my life.
Draw me close that I may see the joy of resting in Your arms and know true love.
Draw me close that I may know and remember true peace.

And so may I rest tonight as a child sleeping on their daddy’s chest and may I awake in the morning with a new lease on life; praising and glorifying You. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

The Pastor -|—

The Fighting God (Exodus 14:14)

/ The Pastor

The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.” [Exodus 14:14]

This short, little verse captured my heart this morning; as God spoke words of comfort after a very long and difficult day.

But first the context of this verse…

The Israelites are being lead out of Egypt by God through Moses and Aaron. God commands the group to head towards the Red Sea and set up camp. Once there, God hardens Pharaoh’s heart and he comes out with everything he has to capture those slaves again.

God did this to show God’s glory.

As they are beside the Red Sea the people see Pharaoh and his army and are scared silly (and a little angry that Moses lead them out here to die). Moses then speaks the word of the Lord to them:

Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will work for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.” (Exodus 14:13-14)

Basically, no need to worry, God has this. You don’t even need to raise one finger. Trust God. God will fight this battle.

With that God parted the Red Sea, the people walked across on dry ground and the rest is history. Praise be to God!

And I needed that verse this morning. Without going into all the details, yesterday was a long and nerve fraying day. I had been up since 2:30 AM with a 4 month old who refused to be put down. My wife was out of town for work. I had two kids not feeling well; both demanding attention and it seemed like at the same time all the time. My toddler was being naughty because she wasn’t getting the attention she demanded. And my 4 month old was difficult to sooth. When I would try to put the younger one down for a nap, the older one would come in crying; waking up the younger.

My emotions and nerves were frayed and I found myself on the verge of tears a number of times. Lots of praying ensued and when Connie finally got home I just crashed.

And then I read this verse this morning:  The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.

[Cue the tears]

Amen!
Praise be to God!
Alleluia!
Thank you!

Have you ever felt defeated or nearly pushed over the edge?
Have you ever felt like the world was ganging up on you?
Have you ever felt like Satan’s onslaughts were going to destroy you?

Have you been there? That was me yesterday, but God fought for me even though I was trying to fight. And this morning God reminded me to give it up to him next time. Satan may try to destroy me in so many ways, and on my own I have no chance but God will fight for me. And God will fight for you.

What an awesome promise.
What a faithful God.

Through Jesus Christ God has defeated Satan but Satan is still trying do as much damage as possible until that day when God makes him a footstool for is Son. So when you see the forces of Satan baring down on you; do not be afraid. The salvation of the Lord has been won for you through faith in Jesus so therefore the Lord will fight for you and the Lord WILL win.

Praise be to God and Alleluia!!!

Thank you, powerful God, that you fight for me. When the forces of evil are marching against me, you are there to push them back. May I have the sight of Elisha to see the chariots of fire around me and may I rest in your promises, oh God. May you be praised, always and forever. Amen.

The Pastor -|—

The Pastor and His Little Girl

/ The Pastor

The heart of this pastor longs to worship and lead worship. Nothing tops praising and thanking God for the hope of the resurrection through faith in Jesus Christ. But dare I say that worshiping with my family, especially my little girl (22 months old), comes in right up there? I say that because this pastor’s heart was touched by his little girl on two occasions this morning during worship.

The first occasion of heart touching (outside of worshiping God of course) came towards the beginning of half of worship. I had just finished presiding over a baptism where I was carrying the cute little baby up and down the aisle to show her off and introduce her to the congregation. I then handed the baby off to her mother and sat down. Just then, from a couple rows back, I heard my little girl crying,

“I want my daddy! I want my daddy!”

The next thing I notice is my little girl coming up to me in my row in tears (my wife broke down and let her come to me). I picked her up and set her on my lap as we listened to scripture being read. I wiped the tears from her eyes and kissed her gently on the cheek; whispering,

“I love you, sweetie”

My little girl just sat there with me very quietly; simply wanting to be near me (my guess is that she was jealous of me carrying the newly baptized baby up and down the aisle). During the final reading I brought her back to her mother and she was fine.

The second occasion of heart touching came during the final song. My routine is to walk up to the front during the final verse (during which time my little girl runs up to join me), I pray silently and then walk out to the narthex; preparing to greet people as they leave. But this time, my little girl was in my row during the first verse so we went up front. I held her tight and said,

“Let’s pray”

She then folded her hands on mine and we prayed. When I finished she said,

“Amen”

So cute
So heart-warming
So wonderful

Worshiping God is great and wonderful and nothing tops that, but I am so glad I get to worship with my family (especially my little girl). And now I look forward to my son (3 1/2 months) to soon start doing the same things as his sister.

The heart of this pastor is definitely bursting, in so many ways.
Thank you, dear God. Thank you.

Praise be to God!!!

The Pastor -|—

My Father’s Arms

/ The Pastor

My 3 1/2 month old son likes to fight sleep when he is lounging in his bouncy seat. He will fuss and thrash and whine and cry. Pacifier or no pacifier, he is not happy until mommy or daddy picks him up. And at that moment he will calm down.

Well…

…I just sat down from living that above episode. Currently my little boy is sleeping soundly in his bassinet. But as I was cradling him in my arms; staring at him, this pastor brain was once again shifting into high gear. Good or bad, I can’t help but work out a “sermon illustration”; especially in a cute and special moment like that. Maybe it is just my faith playing out through my eyes and other senses as the Holy Spirit opens my eyes to see God in various situations.

Whatever the case, as a stared at my sleeping little boy a few words/phrases came to mind:
~ Vulnerable
~ Peaceful
~ At rest
~ Not a care in the world
~ Protected
~ Loved
~ Daddy
~ Child
~ Safe
~ Mine

And as I thought about these words I thought about my heavenly Father. Because really, I don’t experience those words unless I am assured that I am being cradled in my Father’s arms. I am restless and anxious and not at peace if I think I am alone. But that moment when I am reminded of my Father I feel at peace; maybe something like what Malachi was feeling as he drifted off to sleep in my arms.

And when you think about those words, they indeed describe a child of God nestled in the heavenly Father’s arms. Through faith in Jesus this reality is yours. You may forget from time to time. You may think that you are living a nightmare at times but all you need to do is “wake up” and “open your eyes” and see that you are still cradled in your Father’s arms and that those above words are your reality.

Malachi will still have those restless moments and nightmares; that is something I can’t take away. What I can do, though, is always be there to comfort him. In much the same way, our heavenly Father doesn’t take away the nightmares in our lives, but he does continue to hold us. All we need to do is look and see.

So much about the parent/child relationship shines a light on our relationship with our Father in heaven. So maybe this pastor brain/Holy Spirit moment, was nothing more than my Father reminding me of his love for me that I may be at peace. And let me let you, I am feeling peaceful now (and not just because both kids are sleeping). I am feeling at peace in my Father’s arms.

May you feel at peace in your Father’s arms.

Praise be to God!

The Pastor -|—