My wife’s "adopted" grandmother (Alpha) died on Sunday afternoon (9/3/06) at around 3:45pm.  You may be wondering why I said "adopted", well here is the story:

My wife’s family moved to Dawson (my hometown as well) in about 1972 (before Connie was born).  The house they were looking at was a nice two story home.  It had a finished basement with a couple bedrooms.  The second story contained a full apartment with an added bonus…a sweet lady by the name of Alpha.  That right there was worth the price of the home.  If you knew Alpha you would agree with me without hesitation.  She was priceless.

Connie’s parents bought the house; with Alpha in it and all.  And in no time flat, Alpha became an adopted member of the family.  She became the kid’s third grandmother and virtually their only babysitter.  Alpha loved the family and they loved her.  Alpha became so much apart of the family that it is kind of strange to use the adjective "adopted".  Alpha was their grandmother and a very special person.

The years went by and kids grew up.  Eventually they moved out of the house.  And then about three years ago, Connie’s parent sold the house and moved to Sioux Falls.  By this time Alpha was living in the nursing home in Dawson; a place she spent nearly everyday visiting others.  You see, Alpha had the kindest heart I know; always thinking of others. 

Even though they were no longer living together, this family never grew apart.  Alpha was sad because she would not see the Hanson family as much.  And the Hanson family was sad as well because they would not see Alpha as much.  But, like I said, they never grew apart.  They were always in each other’s thoughts and prayers.  Because that is how it goes with family.

Alpha’s biological family was small.  Cancer took Alpha’s husband away after five years of marriage, but it did not take Alpha’s soul. She has some nieces and nephews and a couple great-nieces and nephews.  They loved her very much as well, but they were even farther away.  They visited when they could and called her nearly every week.

Alpha was always quick with a joke.  Every time Connie and I would visit her she had one for us.  I remember her telling us this "shady" joke (as Alpha called it) about a couple strawberries caught in bed together and something about being in a jam.  She laughed and laughed when she told us and one couldn’t help but laugh along.  That joke was probably the "dirtiest" one she ever told.  Her sense of humor stuck with her to the end.

Alpha also loved to tell stories about Connie, Mary and Todd (Connie’s siblings).  There was one about Mary pushing Todd into a snowbank when he was little.  But her favorite story was when Todd was little and he told Alpha to "buzz off".  She thought that was so cute.

Alpha was kind to everyone she met.  While in the nursing home she insisted that when she was in her room, sitting in the wheelchair, that she be facing the hallway so she could see who was passing by.  She was a people person and everyone loved to stop and chat with her.  She will be greatly missed.

Alpha is no longer with us now.  For my wife, it is a time of mourning and a time of reflection.  Questions like:  "Did I do enough?"  resonate in her head.  That is a tough question to answer.  And it is a question we can all ask about our loved ones.  There can always be one more phone call.  There can always be one more visit.  There can also always be one more "I love you".  You can sit and focus on this, but you will either drive yourself crazy or drive yourself to depression.  Instead of focusing on what you could have done, focus on the love you shared with that person.  Focus on those memories and lessons you experienced and learned.  That is what is important.  The past is the past and that can not be changed.  Focus on what you can do in the future.  "Did I do enough?" If you loved them you did a lot.

Alpha will be missed.  I did not know her all that well, but it feels like I did.  It will feel weird going to the nursing home and not seeing her.  It will be hard to walk by Alpha’s room and not become overwhelmed by feelings and memories.  And I will do my best to comfort my wife.  She will have the hardest time.

But there is something comforting we can hold on to.  Consider this: because of Jesus Christ, you will have a chance to meet Alpha someday.  She is waiting for us; standing side by side with our Lord and Savior.  You will meet this angel and then you will know her.  Alpha made this world a better place, I can only imagine how awesome she has made heaven.  I can hardly wait to see her again.  For death is not "good bye", but rather, "see you later".  Jesus made sure of that.

See you later, Alpha.  We will see you soon.  Praise be to God and Amen! -EDH-